“Home Depot™ Presents the Police!®”

computer money invented to buy drugs

“Subway™ Eat Fresh and Freeze, Scumbag!®”

I shot the mailbox again, on purpose.

Oikos™ Greek Yogurt Presents Handcuffs®

Years ago, a central banker killed my partner.

he swiped his credit card to pay me for arresting him.

I haven’t laughed this much in sooooo long! omg lmaoooo All those ™ and ® in the stupid commands omg I can’t rn

lol, I get that part, but how can they assess the presence of weapons if it’s blurred.

I believe ✌👽

You are welcome

I was there when he told me, a stranger he met at the Applebee’s Bar that night after he was hitting on my 8-month pregnant wife then tried to pretend he wasn’t after she introduced me to him as her husband, the story while he was drunk.

Reminds me of when I saw a Mountain Spring Water filling station ornamented with a picture of a snow-capped mountain at a Wal-Mart about 500 miles from the nearest mountain and nearly 2k miles from the nearest snow-capped mountain. The thing had pipes out the back going into the wall. That was straight city water that maybe that dispenser filtered a little more if it was properly maintained.

El queso esta viejo y podrido 🦕

And you don’t want to accept it because that would mean disappointment again.

What’s the point of scanning someone at that level of precision if they can’t even see it? Seems pretty pointless to me.

So TSA is practically seeing everyone naked? Is that for real?

It’s a quote from The Big Lebowski

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-eDOJ4L0Edk

You look for the person who will benefit…And, uh…You know, you’ll, uh…You know what I mean.

Harriet, I have spoken!

Congrats! I’m excited to see your upcoming posts on distro hopping.

I’m not gonna have kids so they can start competing with me for crying time. That’s a limited resource, and I need all of it.

👋😄

And then when you fall, the stomp on you for being a PoS.

it’s what it’s

Ephen Stephen

It has been my experience that the best persona to use at work is one of no humanity. Be a corporate robot. When you walk in those doors, kill any sense of emotion. Look at everything logically. Make no friends. Focus on the tasks that your performance is measured. Leave no room for misinterpretation.

Most people are cool, but some are hunting for opportunities. Don’t give those people any opportunities.