kreekybonez

kebab will always be my top choice, unless shawarma is also an option

you can’t force someone to run you god damn idiot

it takes some serious kompromat to pull that off

I promise there’s no scoffing here! I love my analog bidet, and am always on the lookout for an upgrade, if the price is right. Especially if it can be fitted to a standard american toilet.

Happily taking recommendations, if you have any. The features you listed sound refreshing, relaxing, and somewhat intimidating. Which, to be clear, I’m into.

what’s on the app? profiles for different butts? live feedback from a down-under camera? AI stool analysis?

“oh you meant boot treads? yeah, get those bad boys up here so I can lick the crud out of them”

the resemblance is uncanny

I was saying “boo-urns”

invincible

Klaus will still nail someone’s wife… but it’ll probably be when he forgets to put his forks up to secure a pallet of actual nails

distilled white vinegar, in moderation, can have the same effect, with less severe downsides. my clothes actually dry better with it, since it neutralizes and removes the alkaline detergents that never fully rinse out in a normal water wash. it requires some finesse to know what fabrics to use it on, but I’ve had great results with it

it’s very easy to enter wrong numbers on a calculator, but you need some basic reasoning and familiarity to know when an answer is off, and you need to start over

or a watch!

working on the night soup

you’re a master of minestrone, and bread bowls, for everyone!

that’s a low blow, Loblaws

counter counterpoint: color-coded bubbles for contacts and group chats

the ballot-rog

deleted by creator

starting a petition to report all CEO salaries as hashbrowns/hour

lousy smarch weather