Ill start:
“Me cago en tus muertos” - ill shit all over your dead relatives. Spanish.
Du hast doch nicht alle Tassen im Schrank - German, you don’t have all your cups in the drawer.
Telling someone he is stupid via comparison to cups. Why? Who knows.
It’s like saying somebody is not the sharpest tool in the shed.
My favorite way to say that somebody is stupid is to say “Er ist dumm wie drei Meter Feldweg”, translates to “he’s as dumb as three meters (a bit more than 9 yards) of dirt road”.
Reminds me of ones like “You’re one fry short of a Happy Meal”, or “You’ve lost some marbles”. They generally imply that you’ve lost or are missing some mental faculties.
Storing cups in drawers, huh.
“Schrank” is not really a drawer. Translating it as “cupboard” would be more appropriate, I think.
Ah, maybe. My vocabulary for kitchen furniture is a bit unclear sometimes what equates to what.
Schrank would be a box with doors and several levels of storage inside.
Very Belgian: He doesn’t have all his fries in the same bag / Il n’a pas toutes ses frites dans le même sachet
Meaning that he’s/she’s dumb or confused :D
Similar to “He’s one can short of a six pack”
The English equivalent being, “She is several chicken nuggets short of a happy meal”
A few sandwiches short of a picnic.
A few cards short of a deck.
The German equivalent is “Not all cups in the cupboard”
The Australian equivalent is “a few snags (sausages) short of a barbie (barbeque)”
Altough it’s more like a “gypsy curse”, but there’s one that translates to sth like “I wish you’ll having ten rings but none fingers”
Brazilian portuguese tends to lack impactful phrases, but is full of single curse words. A big portion of them a clear example of how much negative bias there is culturally against certain groups (gay men, women in general, disabled), unfortunately :/
One that isn’t often used, but that I almost always laugh loud whenever I hear, is “Enfia uma dentadura no cu e sorria pro caralho”, which roughly translates into “Stick a denture up your asshole and smile at the dick”. For when simply saying “go fuck yourself” isn’t enough.
My personal favourites from Finnish.
“Ei ole kaikki muumit Muumilaaksossa” “Not having all the Moomins in Moomin Valley” Used for people who are either stupid or lack sanity. There are other variants of this and Moomin one is not older than a couple of decades.
I find our version of Grammar Nazi pretty great. We call them comma fuckers.
“Ei voi kauhalla ottaa jos on lusikalla annettu” “You can’t take with a ladle if it was given with a spoon”. This refers also to a lack of something, usually a lack of intelligence or sense.
“Not having all the Moomins in Moomin Valley”
That’s totally something we’ll use. Thanks :D Also I’m stealing that. I’m stealing that insult and Americanizing it and you can’t stop me
Just be warned Moomins are a gateway to communism (Weird internet theory). Or at least to more Moomins. We literally have Moomin everything here.
In Denmark you have:
- Paragraph Knight - someone who cares too much about rules and regulations.
- Fly Fucker - someone who cares too much about something deeply insignificant.
In German there is “Paragraphenreiter” - Paragraph rider.
German: “Du Lappen”
Translates to “You rag”, pretty much calling someone a loser or idiot.
Băga-mi-aș pula-n coliva mă-tii de să-mi sară coaiele din bomboană-n bomboană
This is a highly niche one in my native language as well, as one must also know what is colivă - it’s basically a desert that we eat at funerals with m&m-sized candies in it as well. So it roughly translates let me stick my dick in your mother’s coliva so hard that my balls jump from candy to candy
Does the insult mean the colivā is served at your mother’s funeral, or that it’s the colivā your mother made? Also in what kind of context you use this insult?
I’m not the OP but usage is dealer’s choice. It’s smooth jazz all the way down.
That is elaborate, vulgar, and 100% delightful. I love hearing stuff like this. Cursing in American English is so boring lol
“mange tes morts” in french, can be translated to “eat your deads” which is like go fuck yourself
- Γαμώ το σπίτι σου (literally: fuck your house) I guess this basically means to fuck your whole family
- Γαμώ τη Παναγία σου (literally: fuck your Saint Mary)
- Γαμώ το Χριστό σου (literally: fuck your Jesus)
- Να μου κλάσεις τον πούτσο (literally: fart my dick) I guess this means “I’ll fuck you from behind”
- Πάρ’τα 3 μου (literally: take my 3) The 3 is implied for balls, and they’re 3 instead of 2 because it’s more manly I guess lmao
- Κλάσε μου τα 3 (literally: fart my 3) A combination of the previous two
- Αρχίδι (literally: testicle) You can actually call someone a testicle in Greek
If you rotate a 3 clockwise it becomes a pair of balls
We have something similar to “fuck your house”. “Fuck your couch” is a popular insult in American English thanks to Rick James and The Chappele Show. Still, “fuck your house” is more extreme because I guess it includes the couch, too.
Those are all amazing insults that you listed, btw.
Heard one: Your mother has a penis and your father is jealous of it.
Here are a few Austrian ones:
“Häferl” (Cup): someone with anger management issues
“Du rüttelst am Watschenbaum” (You are shaking the slap tree): I’m close to deliver the fruit of said tree to you.
“Ohrwaschlkaktus” (Ear cactus): Someone with large, protruding ears
“Saubauch” (Hog belly): A way of telling someone that they are fat and dumb at the same time. But in a nice way.
In Tamil: சோத்துல உப்பு போட்டு தான தின்ற?
Translation: Don’t you add salt to your food?
Context: This is when somebody doesn’t react/listen/change no matter how much they are insulted. The other party asks if they add salt to their food, or if they only eat bland food, and thus have lost all emotions and have become as bland as their food.
It’s a bit difficult to explain, but the general belief is that food reflects your emotions and reactance and moods. Bland food - emotionless, spicy food - easy to anger, etc.
“I piss in your mother’s death”
Alternatively, “May Stalin fuck you”
And yes, I live in Eastern Europe.
May Stalin fuck you
Please share how to say this
Fută-te-ar Stalin
Pronounced: Foot-uh-tea-are Stalin
Congrats! You can swear in Romanian now!
My favorite has to be zkundyksicht, it comes from “z kundy ksicht” which literally means “a face [that came] from a cunt”. “Z” = from, “kunda” = cunt, “ksicht” = a rude way to say face.
Oh my god cuntface is my new favourite insult. Thank you for this!
Glad I could be of service!
Not my native language but the German language has some pretty fantastic words/insults like “punchable face” (backpfeifengesicht) and “brain denier” (gehirnverweigerer).
“Dich soll der Blitz beim Scheißen treffen!”
May lightning strike you while you shit. One of my personal favourites.
Also Knödelfriedhof (dumpling graveyard) for obese people is kind of funny I think.
I hadn’t heard that one before but your opinion is objectively wrong: It’s not “kind of funny”, it’s hilarious.
People got banned from Reddit for less.
I caught a ban from reddit for pointing out that COVID 19 could kill you. This was during the height of the pandemic too.
People caught bans for some spectacularly stupid stuff on reddit and their reporting system is straight up broken, so plenty of bad shit goes ignored indefinitely.